What are We Searching for?

By Cassia Bates, on "The Recovering Perfectionist"

Hi Ladies. I want to ask you a question. What are we searching for? Why do so many of us burn our hair, pinch our eyelashes, smear stuff on our faces, pluck our eyebrows, spend hours in front of the mirror, and worry so much about how we appear?



Do we think we can starve ourselves in order to fill ourselves with some fantasy form of validation? Do we think that attention obtained in any form, is worth more than our dignity? Do we think people will notice or judge our every move, word, or look? True friends won't. True people won't care. Actually, they will probably appreciate that we're relatable when we mess up.

My point is, let's stop living in fear! In reality, most people are likely too worried about what they look like, or how they say things, that they don't really care about you. Not that they don't care as i.n they don't love you, but they don't care as in they have too much on their mind to be worrying about your flaws.


Now don't get me wrong. There are some people out there who just judge and put people down in

an attempt to make themselves feel better, but what I'm saying is that we shouldn't care. Who cares if someone else doesn't like us for some weird reason? I believe that the only opinion that matters, is God's opinion.







That overwhelming crave for attention, love, and validation is ingrained in each human soul… But it can become a problem when it is our main reason for action. If we don't get that sense of worth from others, and that is the only thing that makes us feel good about ourselves, it can be devastating. We need to have a higher source of purpose. I know that when I do things just to get attention from others, or just really want to be noticed, it's like running a race with no finish line. It is empty and useless because that attention we might get is fleeting. Doing things for attention is selfish. It is hurtful, unkind, and just plain annoying.





I want to believe that we can stop worrying about what others think about us. I want to believe that we can do things for reasons other than to get attention. I want to believe that we can do things for the soul cause of love. I want to believe that I can just be free to be me; my true, unshaded, real me.


I don't know if we can get rid of this “want to be loved”. As Ingrid Michaelson put it “Everybody, everybody wants to be loved.” (Link to the song to know what I'm talking about:) Love makes the world go round. Since the day we were born, we needed love in some form, to survive.





Even though that want for love is inside us, we can develop the motive of love towards others. Through gratitude, and service and being outward centered, we can turn this whole damaging attention seeking mentality around, and be like lights illuminating the path of lasting happiness.

It Might Seem...

It might seem, there's always someone prettier.
It might seem, there's always someone wittier.
It might seem, there's always someone that has it all,
And you don't, 'cause you're just really small.

It might seem, that the world looks down
Upon you, and gossips and frowns.
It might seem that nobody cares,
And you can't help think, it's just not fair.

It might seem, that you don't have worth.
It might seem, you're made fun of with mirth.
It might seem, you're just not cool.
And no one says, You rock! or You rule!

All of these things, might seem to be,
Like the whole wide world, just doesn't see,
But I have great news, for you and me!
All these things, don't have to be!

You can change how you think!
You don't have to be sad and shrink!
For you are a Child of God.
And if people ask if you're odd, then nod!

 

It's ok to be apart from the croud,
It's way better, and it's alowed!
And all that other stuff
Like being popular or tough,

Doesn't really matter one bit!
And if, ever sad, you get,
Just remember that true bliss,
Does not come from 'coolness'.

 
True joy comes from inside of you.
From selflessness and serving too.
From knowing that you're a child of God!
And knowing the narrow path, you trod.


That's what makes you happy.
And all the worldly stuff is crappy,
Compared to doing His will.
And the feeling you'll get, is real.





~Snickerdoodle ;)